Life with an Angel – III

The day was passing. The Sun was sinking slowly behind the high rises and its red rays lit up the sky above the western horizon. We stood on the side of a Delhi flyover. Bent on my knee, I looked up to her. The Sun blocked by her head created a halo of gold around her. With her serene white gown and her hairs flowing in the wind, she looked absolutely stunning; an Angel straight from the heaven.

My heart was beating so fast I thought it was going to burst out of my chest. It was one of the most exciting and nerve-racking times of my life. I had prepared a speech in my mind on what to say when I go down on my knee but when the moment came, I failed to execute it. I was so nervous I started mumbling something which I cannot recollect till today.. except that it ended with the three magical words. I closed my eyes and the world came to a standstill for the next few seconds. I could not hear anything, could not see anything except her.

The next sound I could hear was that of my alarm; which went on growing louder in intensity and annoying in nature. The dream was over. Again. I was back from the dream world and the reality was I could never gather the courage to tell her what I felt about her. Yes, there were a few blog posts dedicated to her along with some time-to-time personal messages. But I never had the guts to put it in a straight way. No matter how much I preached the “Live for the moment” theory, this was something I always delayed till the next time. It wasn’t because I was afraid she would say “NO”. Perhaps, I knew that I was only going to be able to do it only once in my life, so I had to do it perfectly. Perhaps, I was not sure why it was to be done.

 She is undoubtedly one of the best things that ever happened to my life. She is the only one I had ever thought about. Having gone through the ups and downs in the relation we shared, I realized no one ever makes me feel the same way before. Nobody makes me happy like she does. She fills my soul with immense pleasure and delight. I just feel complete with her. And I realize all I want is to grow old with her.

And we were really having a ball till the apocalypse year arrived.

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Ghost of the Past

The other night I was talking to her when we started talking about truths of life, past and related fears. As always, she was reluctant talking about it. After a while, I paused and started wondering why we fear our past. We all have a past, a deep dark past. There are always certain things which we wish we had not said or done; things which we don’t want anyone to know.
Why do some of us spend so much time thinking about their past? Why do they fear talking about it? The most prominent reasons which come to my mind are that we didn’t expect ourselves making so many mistakes as we made and we assume a lot of things will turn out as we expect them to. This post briefly summarizes my viewpoint on how to let go of our past and not fear it.  It is one of the most important lessons of life – living in the present is the key to happiness. The past is over and gone; never to return. The future is not guaranteed.
Most of the times, we are able to put our mistakes of past (regrets?) behind us, especially the ones which are not major disappointments. And once we overcome them, we don’t fear them; personally or while sharing them with others. However, there are a few things which we are unable to get over in our minds. Those are things we regret about our past and fear sharing them. The main reasons behind this fear are the sense of losing something/someone and the belief that it might affect your present. Our minds keep returning back to what “might” have been, “could” have been and “should” have been. The more we think about the events we regret, the more the associated fear deepens. It follows us wherever we go and stops us from achieving our aspirations. 
How to let go of your past?
The most critical fact about past is that it cannot be changed. The events that you regret have already happened. And since there is no way to change the past, it is better if we learn to accept it. I believe that we should never regret our past decisions because they are what we considered the best at that particular moment. In case of failures, we just need to learn from those and move ahead. “Let it be” is one of the best phrases I’ve heard which helps me get rid of the past.

 

Once we learn to accept the things the way they are, we should stop thinking about them. The problem is that when we think about those events, we start imagining how the things could have been and then we realize that things have changed, which upsets us. It starts with a single thought but as soon as we start, it is almost impossible to stop. One thought leads to another and a vicious circle is formed.
One more important thing in this process is to realize the truth of impermanence. We should realize that outcome of the next second is unpredictable. Death can come at any moment. Therefore, we don’t have enough time to keep worrying about the past and ruining our present also. If someone tells us that we had only a few days of life left; we would regret spending so much time thinking about the past. As the time passes, we would be able to train our mind to ignore such thoughts, ultimately leading to complete dis-attachment.  
The next thing is to learn to accept that we can be wrong sometimes. We often don’t allow ourselves and others to be less than perfect. We need to learn to forgive not only others but also ourselves. Lastly, to overcome the fear of sharing our past, we should realize that people who care about us would accept us the way we are; with our mistakes and past, no matter how dark it is. Sharing always helps to overcome fears.
Letting go of past is like lifting a weight off our chest. It prevents us from being stagnant, allows us to move on and enjoy our present. It might be hard to accomplish but if we believe in ourselves and realize the aforesaid points, it is possible to overcome every fear related to your past and live completely for the present.

The Moon

As he stepped out of his college building, something wonderful happened. The first image he received was that of the full moon. Round, clear and spotless. A Chinese poem states:

“The fresh and beautiful moon is traveling in the utmost empty 
sky. When the mind-rivers of living beings are free, that 
image of the beautiful moon will reflect in each of us.” 

He set his eyes on the Moon. It reminded him of the past. The one he was trying hard to forget, the one he was trying to let go of. It reminded him of her. Her carefree laugh started to echo in his ears and their talks captured his mind. They would always fight over who had a better choice. Her choice was Moon, his was she herself. And this was the only thing where he didn’t love to lose against her. He stood by his beliefs, she stood by hers. Never coming to an end. And then one day, a new chapter started. She had vowed to prove him wrong. He had always asked her to be strong, confident and fight till the end with a great willpower but he never knew these skills could also be used against him. He stood shocked as she went on to prove how bad a choice he had.

Tomorrow, she may not be with him. He may forget everything about her. But what about the moon? The moon would always be there. And remind him of his imperfect choice. Always.

Man’s Greatest Invention

Twitter is one of the greatest inventions ever made by man. Anything and everything in just 140 characters. As simple as that. Apparently, when people have less space to express, they tend to be intelligent with their words. Restoring the previous session in my Firefox brought me to my Twitter homepage and a twitter trend made sure I didn’t switch the tab. It was #greatestinvention which had got my thoughts racing. What could be the greatest invention made by human?
Is it the wheel? It changed the entire life of human beings. It gave the actual meaning to movement and has made the world smaller and smaller. Or is it the printing press? It was one of the first media of communication. It changed the ways how information was collected, stored, retrieved and distributed. Could it be the telephone? The idea of talking to a person sitting thousands of miles away from you was incredible. While the wheel made travelling possible, it reduced the necessity to travel. Okay, if not wheel, then what about automobile. Invented after a long time of the invention of wheel, it improved transportation and made movement swift and hassle-free. Television also stands a strong chance. It improved upon the radio and allowed better ways of transmission of news and other important media. It also became an excellent source of entertainment. Then I wondered about Computers. Since its invention in 1837 by Charles Babbage, the computer has changed billions of life. It changed the way we work. From a collection of vacuum tubes covering two rooms to a device which fits in your pocket, the computers have evolved exponentially. And the invention of Internet has only added to the value of computers. Internet was one of the revolutions which converted the globe into a village by fostering the share of information.
The list goes on and on. Steam engine, airplane, LASER, DNA, several vaccines etc. etc. A quick search on Google with the keywords “the greatest invention ever is *” returns thousands of results ranging from sex to space travel. Some consider the remote control the greatest whereas some think the same for seedless watermelon. 
Suddenly something struck me. The greatest invention ever made by man has to be… GOD!! Yes, God. None of the above mentioned inventions could control the minds of millions and millions of people making them conform to one ideal. None of them. There are and have been thousands of Gods. The Hindus alone worship 36 crores of them. A word defined by the brilliant minds of a few humans in the ancient times, God has touched the life of everyone on this planet Earth in one way or the other. Along with God, came Religion, the byproduct of God. It is the best tool to control a mass of people. It has enabled a bunch of people to control the entire human race by injecting fear and religious madness in their minds. It is the only thing which can make people wonder not only about their present, but also their previous and future births. What other invention can make people fight among themselves or even give up their own life? What else other than God can make people accept everything wrong that happened to them?
Inventions were made and forgotten, but God is immortal, the greatest of them all. How can any invention ever stand up to God?

So Close Yet So Far

A lot can be written about Mother but it’s not easy to write about Father. Mother is a metaphor for emotions whereas Father has the power to control. He is like a silent poem; which has an external toughness and is devoid of emotions. And this is the reason why most of the children fear him. The ones who can see through this shell and feel the amount of emotions he hides in himself shall accept his greatness. Undoubtedly, he has the same amount of love for his children as the Mother. He has loads of emotions and feelings but he generally keeps them to himself making it difficult for the others to experience them. He has a large heart and a larger personality. He is the one who lets others to be free-minded and carefree.
A mother is often referred as the first teacher of any child but I believe, it’s the father who prepares him for the journey called life. She is there to make him survive for the first few years and Father is the one who makes sure he survives the rest of his tough life. He not only tells him about the positive aspects of life but also warns about the adversities he might face. He teaches him the art of survival and makes him tough enough to bear the brunt of the real world when he steps out of home. He shares his knowledge and experience with him.
If there is one single word to sum up father, it has to be humble. He rarely talks about himself unless you ask him something. This is the reason it is somewhat hard to really get to know him. His silence encapsulates his personality. Very few would have seen him crying. He is immovable under all circumstances. He is head-strong and soft-hearted simultaneously. He’d always worry about things but would never let others to worry about them. He is generally like that only. Calm, composed, thoughtful and emotionless. He is the main pillar which supports each and every brick of the building called family. He not only fulfills our needs but also puts constraints on our unjust demands. He is the childhood hero and the idol of every child.
He is the one who knows when to leave you alone but is always there when you look behind your shoulder. Someone who encourages you not to settle for anything less than the best. Someone who lets you have ice-cream for breakfast and the one who loves you unconditionally (actually). Someone who wants to keep you from making mistakes but instead lets you find your own way even though his heart breaks in silence when you get hurt. Someone who holds you when you cry, scolds you when you break the rules, shines with pride when you succeed, and has faith in you even when you fail. He is the person to turn to when you have to take any tough decision. He wants to catch you before you fall but instead picks you up, brushes you off and lets you try again.
That’s dad for me. All I know about him. But He still stands unexplored; the journey is unending.

“If you are friends with your father, you have a friend for life.”